I'd like to Sit on a Bar Stool in Heaven Right Next to Christ

I’d like to sit
On a bar stool in heaven
Right next to Christ.

We’d share a jug of beer
And a packet of smokes
(although I doubt he’d inhale)

I think I’d tell him
About fast cars on open roads
8th birthday parties
And Arsenal’s disappointing away form
I hope he’d tell me
About his favourite star
Why sheep exist
And how he thought of photosynthesis

By the second jug
We’d move to sit by the fire
Have a couple of cigars
And a packet of peanuts

I think I’d get angry
And ask Him
About rape and HIV and Hiroshima and cot-death
Then he’d get even angrier
And ask Me
About rape and HIV and Hiroshima and cot-death

And then
Then maybe we’d sit quietly
And sup our pints
The fire would burn
The logs would crackle
And the world would turn

After a while I’d tell him a story
He’d tell me a joke
And we’d play a few games of dominoes.

I heard this poem read at a dfg performance at the last greenbelt and loved it (along with the rest of their performance which also includes music and drama…tons and tons of high british drama!). I particularly like the “I think I’d get angry…” verse. (via Steve)